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Happy Clyde

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Navigator of the Seas Promenade Deck

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Nice is Nice This Time of Year

We blew off the big boat excursions today, choosing instead to set off on our own, at our own pace. It was a great choice.

We snagged a train to Nice, made our way to the market, and spent the morning noshing on whatever little treats caught our eyes: the fresh-baked caramel macaroons, a handmade chocolate rocher (like those Ferro Roche candies in the states, but made with pure cane sugar and cocoa butter by a woman named Yvette), and a local delicacy -- a chic pea crepe made in a huge flat pan over hot coals (served with lots of olive oil and pepper). After shopping for pillows in Galleries LaFayette (long story), we hopped on a train to Beaulieu, where we toured the Villa Kyrios, an homage to one archeologist's obsession with all things Greek, and the over-the-top pink wedding cake of a mansion built by the Baronness de Rothchild. The gardens -- there are eight of them -- are a never-ending maze of stone, Japanese water features, zen installations, cactus and succulent arrangements, fountains, stone ornaments ... you name it.

After that, we dined in the Baronness' dining hall -- a music box of a dining room with huge windows opening out onto sea views. Excellent lasagna, a good salad, and a delicious slice of chocolate cake ... And then we caught the bus back to the port in Villefranche. Easy, fun, and relaxing -- and we were so happy not to be following a crowd around, chasing a woman within numbered paddle!

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In Nice

Well, technically, we're in Beauliue-Sur-Mere. Clyde is much improved, and was able to enjoy yesterday in Cinque Terre and today in Nice. We had chic pea crepes for breakfast in the local market, and hope to have lunch at the Baronness Rothchild's villa shortly.

Stories for later: the iPad conversation in the pizzeria in Rome, the long journey from train to ship, the mojitos whipped up by Aladdin, the snails at dinner.

In Monterosso

After a rough start (Clyde came down with a severe sore throat just before we left the USA), our cruise is underway.

Today, we're in Cinque Terra, doing a whirlwind tour of the five seaside towns. It's a pre-packaged excursion -- one of the many Royal Caribbean sells on this cruise. The area is beautiful ... but the pace is a bit of a death march! It would be better to pick one town and do it well than march us through all five in a day.

Still, this is a much nicer way to spend a Monday than, say, stuffed in a corporate cube! And, with Clyde recovering (he's been himself for the first time in days today), things are getting better and better.

Few check-ins this trip, and fewer photos, since the boat people charge sixty-five cents per minute -- and have a system that doesn't work with iPads and iPhones. ("Internet Explorer only!" What is this -- 1999?)

Have a great week. Know that, wherever we are, we're having a good, strong drink on your behalf.

Twisted Comics I Can't Draw: Multi-Touch

I can't draw well enough to draw comics, but if I could, I'd draw this twisted one today, which features a psychologist talking with a kid:

"Bobby, can you use this iPad to show me how the strange man multi-touched you?"

What Do You Use Your iPad For?

Last week, a co-worker spotted me in the hall and said, "I see you with your iPad all the time. What do you really use it for?"

As it turns out, my iPad and I had been the focus of a lunch table conversation. Beyond watching movies or reading books on it, people just couldn't imagine what my iPad and I do together all day long.

It's a fair question -- and one that many potential iPad owners might ask. So, in order of frequency, here's what I actually use my iPad for:

1. Reading books using the Amazon Kindle app. I also read Wired Magazine.

2. Surfing the web using Safari.

3. Tweeting tweets to Twitter (which are then automatically posted to Facebook as status updates) using Echofon.

4. Quickly browsing more than 50 web sites to find just the articles I want to read using the Reeder RSS feed reader. (And reading longer articles I've saved to read later using Instapaper.)

5. Checking and composing email. This includes blogging via email using Posterous.

6. Sharing photos with friends and family. People love looking at photos on the big, bright, iPad screen.

7. Taking meeting notes (and maintaing lists of books to read, movies to see, and music to download) using SimpleNote.

8. Drafting chapters of my next book using Simplenote (but soon switching to Chapters, once it has DropBox integration).

9. Researching vacation destinations and building a database of places to go and things to see using Evernote.

10. Keeping track of my ToDo list using Things.

11. Tracking my blood pressure, heart rate, and weight over time using HeartWise.

12. Browsing photos other friends have taken and shared using FlickPad.

13. Reading the news using the USAToday, Digital Post, and New York Times Editor's Choice apps.

14. Checking the weather using Weather HD.

15. Getting directions from Maps.

16. Reading and studying the Bible using BibleXPress.

17. Getting 50-60% off meals using ScoutMob coupons, plus finding nearby eateries with Urbanspoon.

18. Checking multiple gmail accounts with MailWrangler.

19. Doing Tarot readings with TarotHD.

20. Doing iChing readings with Yi Jing.

21. Playing Angry Birds, Osmos HD, or fiddling with Gravilux.

22. Listening to music on Pandora, generating ambient music using Somnium, playing music on the Air Harp, or interacting with music, light, and sound using Bloom HD.

23. Making phone calls via Skype.

24. Chatting with friends on multiple chat platforms using Meebo.

25. Streaming video from my desktop machine to my iPad using AirVideo.

26. Browsing YouTube video and downloading local copies of videos I like using MiTube. (Heh heh heh.)

27. Brainstorming with iMandalArt, Priority Matrix, Popplet, iThoughtsHD, or Oblique Strategies.

28. Tweaking photos with PhotoPal, PhotoFX Ultra, PhotoPad, PhotoForge, and Filterstorm.

29. Controlling the Mac Mini hooked up to our TV using TouchPad.

30. Browsing Craigslist for deals using CraigsPro.

Increasingly, the easier question to answer is, "What *don't* you use your iPad for?"

Storms Moving into Midtown

Another snapshot from the car, fiddling with my iPhone camera and the HDR Pro app.

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Clouds, Cables, Cars

Nabbed this shot with my iPhone on our way to the movie theatre this afternoon.

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Instant MakeOvers with Portrait Professional

I'm having fun this morning exploring a new software package called Portrait Professional. With a few clicks of the mouse and some simple adjustments, the software covers blemishes, reshapes faces according to well-established standards of human beauty, and shaves off a few pounds, too.

Here's one of my favorite photos of me, prior to enhancement:

 

And me, after being Portrait Professional-ed:

The magic's rooted in the software's ability to smooth skin tones and narrow faces. I was curious about what it would do with people who were already young and handsome, so I fed it a photo of one of the nephews -- again, a favorite photo of mine, taken on our trip to Barcelona:

Pretty good photo, right? Now, here's the same guy, after enhancement:

Again, the subtle differences make all the difference -- here, the nephew looks just a little younger, just a little thinner. He's still recognizable, but he's just ... enhanced.

This is, of course, how people like Paula Deen and Valerie Bertinelli ("Can you believe she's fifty?") manage to look so great on magazine covers: their skin tones have been averaged out, their wrinkles have been smoothed, their heads have been elongated, their eyes have been repositioned, their teeth have been whitened, and their hair has been digitally varnished with gloss.

Take it too far, and people start looking like plastic rubber doll versions of humans -- impossibly perfect, with alabaster teeth and skin stretched tight as a drum:

Hey, Paula! You're not the only one who can be filtered to the max, digitally ironed out, and buffed out to the point you're no longer human! Here's me, after a severe digital makeover:

PS: The first three MadeByMark.com readers who send me portraits of themselves, I'll gladly give you one subtle -- and one not-so-subtle -- makeover. (I'll also want to post the results here ... so don't share a photo if you're shy!)